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James Veitch - Opening Night Comedy Allstars Supershow 2018

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#JamesVeitch fills out a doctor's form in true Veitch style. Melbourne International Comedy Festival's Opening Night Comedy Allstars Supershow. Palais Theatre, Wednesday 28 March 2018. Other ways to follow the #MICF funnies: Facebook: http://bit.ly/facebookMICF Twitter: http://bit.ly/twitterMICF Instagram: http://bit.ly/instagramMICF More laughs? Festival Club Highlights: http://bit.ly/2IRy2mp The Gala 2004: http://bit.ly/2x690KN Classic Clips: http://bit.ly/2x690KN About the Festival: Established in 1987, Melbourne International Comedy Festival (#MICF) is one of the three largest comedy festivals in the world, alongside Edinburgh Festival Fringe and Montreal's Just for Laughs Festival. Over the last week of March and into April every year, #MICF transforms Melbourne into the comedy capital of the world, as local and international comedians take to theatres, pubs, clubs and broom cupboards citywide - shining a spotlight on the silly, the serious, the heart-breaking and the hilarious. Filming hours of comedy content every Festival, this channel delivers some of the highlights over the years. Delve into the archive of comedy with international stars (such as: Katherine Ryan, Michael Che, Sara Pascoe, James Veitch) and home-grown #aussiecomedy heroes (including: Hannah Gadsby, Josh Thomas, Aunty Donna, Ronny Chieng) and so many more! To find out what’s happening in Australian comedy, head to our website: www.comedyfestival.com.au
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Text Comments (1013)
CHERYL KELLER (8 hours ago)
Now whenever I fill out a form I’m going to chuckle thinking about what funny answers I could put
Red T (20 hours ago)
Professional troll ftw.
Martin Valášek (3 days ago)
Could have been longer... Hes the best 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣
Lyman Wartupua (3 days ago)
I just discovered this guy on Ted...Wow I just love his style of comedy...
Nicole Young (4 days ago)
you, sir, are my husband's spirit animal
Maizily Maisie (9 days ago)
1000th comment
el amigo tarnix (10 days ago)
Literally cant stop watching this guy. Not that i want to, but i couldn't
Astrid van den Berg (10 days ago)
can I have a free toaster? your case number is #00021978 please call me Kitkat can we talk about the ducks
Lisa Marie (12 days ago)
Where has this this comedian been all my life??? 😆😆😆
Noah Gilbert (12 days ago)
Half the time I don’t know what he’s saying but it’s funny nonetheless
No Idea (13 days ago)
"Have you considered suicide?" Yes I have, but I'm not the type to commit to things.
Insanity (14 days ago)
Veitch your my hero!!
Account An0nymous (14 days ago)
Lets initiate Phils 4 Step Plan; STEP ONE: Remove the windoes. And thats only step one!
Lori Matthew (14 days ago)
JAMES IS SUCH A FUNNY GUY, HE ALWAYS PICKS ME UP WHEN I 'M FEELING DOWN. 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣😂😂😂😂
bondmode (17 days ago)
he's going to look like full-spec woody allen by the year 2030, I telly ou
鳳凰S.D. (17 days ago)
That was the coolest way to get out of the stage
Mrugal Shah (18 days ago)
James, we need to talk about the ducks.
Audrey Li (3 days ago)
Mrugal Shah I did.
We_High._.In-Density_ (5 days ago)
Your email intrigues me, lmao
Hamida Sajjad (7 days ago)
@Audrey Li the bathroom ducks...😂
Mrugal Shah (7 days ago)
Yes, the ducks. You will only get this joke if you have seen his other videos
Audrey Li (7 days ago)
*the ducks???*
Ddj Kxjxjxj (20 days ago)
1:50 one word; yes
alex (28 days ago)
Doc: You wrote "death is inevitable." James: It is-! They should have told you on Day 1! 😂
I'm waiting 90 days to change my name (1 month ago)
Thanks for this video. kitkat
Account An0nymous (1 month ago)
I didn’t receive my complimentary toaster for watching this video! Sigh, I can’t believe this.
Lex Hari (1 month ago)
KITKAT
towert7 (1 month ago)
I wouldn't be surprised if James Veitch studied a good deal of human psychology. His analysis of the adult intake assessment form shows a high level of thinking with regards to human psychology.
Stefano Serrao (1 month ago)
a young Woody Allen
Jeffrey Walker (1 month ago)
VERY rarely do I laugh out loud watching stand up. Sir, you have achieved the VERY rare, about every 30 seconds. Subscriber for life. (And for my inevitable death.)
Lisett González (1 month ago)
1:46 ... what she wanted to say was "Have you had suicidal thoughts?". But I think she got the wording wrong and she said, "Have you ever considered suicide?" (Gosh, this really got me uncontrollably laughing :D
Alex Zhang (1 month ago)
My man did make a choice Crossing all the choices
Yoshi Sakurai (1 month ago)
Omg this dude is just Im laughing my ass off😂😂😂😂😂😂
moorzymoores (1 month ago)
He's a proper uncunny funt
Unexpected Potato (1 month ago)
Oh James, you are a treasure
Diego Crusius (1 month ago)
inspiring
Tonka Tuff Tots (1 month ago)
James Veitch as the new doctor
Mike CorLeoné (1 month ago)
Harry potter has a sense of humor
No use for lazy people None. (1 month ago)
Good, Clean Comedy, So, why can't ALL comedians do it this way. Sadly, Vulgarity seems to be an EASIER way to make others laugh,,even if it's an UNCOMFORTABLE LAUGH,,,and isn't that just SAD?
elenchus (1 month ago)
I love joke stacking in a rule of threes joke, like at 2:28
Amsal Sihombing (1 month ago)
Smart
TONDUR (1 month ago)
They muss Hate you .
Audrey Chavarin (1 month ago)
James looks like a 42 year old teenager
tolfan (1 month ago)
I think this guy has the sharpest quickest smartest wit I've ever witnessed
Luma (1 month ago)
I love his -Hummus- jokes.
Animalyze71 (1 month ago)
His humor is brilliant, those forms for Jobs and such I do the same things: What race? : Human Sex: Not recently Age: Over 30 but under 50 Last Job worked/Job description: 5th Regional Bank/ Heist Religion: Na na na na boo boo
Shockme :U (1 month ago)
1:55 Is it Freddie Highmore?
giannis_a a (1 month ago)
1:54
Eric Johnson (1 month ago)
do you have any gas james? then please drive away slowly
Dream Lights (1 month ago)
This man needs a Netflix special 🙏💕
Divyanshu Meratwal (2 months ago)
Toster BONANZA
Alex Landherr (2 months ago)
His bit on spam email is superbly funny.
hiba ishaq (2 months ago)
YouTube recommended me ducks..and here I am binge watching.
Remco F. Gerritsen (2 months ago)
This is just to amazing :P I must have more!
TheSerpentGamer (2 months ago)
Agh the therapy forms. That’s such a mood
Robert Texidor (2 months ago)
Best comedian I’ve ever seen
Timothius Zamora (2 months ago)
If you truly dislike such forms...never accept an invitation from the white house... Just ask Neil...xD
UberKrassMann (2 months ago)
i diagnose you with using comedy to compensate for your inferiority complex
ThatLegoDude Animations (2 months ago)
She said "where will you live?" I said "Boom."
Fretless99 (2 months ago)
He's very good....I am impressed
jphilly819 (2 months ago)
He’s amazing
Ryan Meyer (2 months ago)
Solomon your offer intrigues me...
Bert Dahlman (2 months ago)
He is really funny and i always watch his videos when i need a good laugh. The bits with the ducks is my favorite.
conqueror the Wolf (2 months ago)
He does have a point we are all going to die some day
Erica Thomas Falconar (3 months ago)
Genius
Marcos Simon (3 months ago)
1:52 Im laughing so hard that im makin wierd noises
Angeliz Arias (3 months ago)
Wow this made me laugh nonstop
Trisha Kashyap (3 months ago)
His life is chaos.
Saathvik Kamma (3 months ago)
james deserves a trillion dollars
Islay (3 months ago)
...pretty sure those assessment questions screen for ADHD.
MOJN42 (3 months ago)
James: misses box Therapist: we're dealing with a twisted mind here...
Isaac Bell (3 months ago)
2019
California Hwy 1 (3 months ago)
Love Veitch
Alison Roberts (3 months ago)
That’s a test for adult ADHD / ADD .....WHY were they giving him THAT???
KuddlyKisses (3 months ago)
Hey! It's KitKat! 😜
jaredloveless (3 months ago)
wee!
umberceri (3 months ago)
I LOVE THIS GUY!
Slipnslidemessiah (3 months ago)
I'd love to see how he fills out a job application from, are there any of those?
sofia andrik (3 months ago)
He has a uncunning resemblance to Woody Allen, no?
Aryan SATPATHY (3 months ago)
The MCQs got me!!!😂😂
Reeble Snarfle (3 months ago)
I LUFF DIS KOOKOO...🤪
Cindy Davis (3 months ago)
I ove this guy he is out of this world
Pearl Carayo Herrera-Lim (3 months ago)
this is my favorite person
A Leech (3 months ago)
Aaaaaa why did I not fom
xXWolfie EclipseXx (4 months ago)
... James we need to talk about the ducks
Sydney Witcher (4 months ago)
hummus, it's gonna be big
Not of This world (4 months ago)
This is the most brilliant and funny man alive. What a mind. I love his sense of humor.
yester day (4 months ago)
I'm actually claustrophobic but I wouldn't mind getting stuck in an elevator with this guy for a few hours, I think I could get over my fear just listening to him talk!
Crazy Funny Cats (4 months ago)
Contact lenses wouldn’t work
nkryptchn 02 (4 months ago)
This guy is fucking hilarious 😆
StopMoshin (4 months ago)
Government: why do you feel the need to own a firearm? Me: well a lot of people (mostly in some form of authoritative position) keep asking me weirdly personal questions like why I need to own a firearm.
Rama Bandyopadhyay (4 months ago)
Did you get the toaster?
Cynthia Hawkins (4 months ago)
ER Doctor to me, years ago: "Do you hear voices?" Me: "I can hear yours..just..fine.." ER Doc: (annoyed), "No, no..I mean, do you hear voices?" I realize looking back now, that what he was trying to determine was, whether or not I was sane. Doctors interviews are ripe with exchanges such as this, since most medical people are pompous, indifferent, and only half listening anyway. I love James Veitch's off the wall observations. He speaks for us all, when we encounter the immovable. He.. moves it!!
Isabella (4 months ago)
Love u kit kat¡¡¡an idea please, will be so funny if u do a performsnce abt what you order on line,and what you reallly get
Ahmed360 (4 months ago)
Genius
Mmm K (4 months ago)
I've seen this clip I don't know how many times, and each time I am really LOL'ing!! His comedy is so wonderful.
W Boswell (4 months ago)
That guy is f---ing funny!!! I DONT CARE WHO YOU ARE!!!
Sana Mank (4 months ago)
He looks like millennial woody allen
AnimeFan245 :3 (4 months ago)
Bro this guy is so funny I can't get enough of him! I have been watching almost all this dudes stand up comedy videos and totally think he deserves more attention and TED talks! This guys is hilarious and watch him for hours on end!
Xrlylyl lylylyl (4 months ago)
‘Have you considered suicide?’
life 7 (5 months ago)
I love this guy
yester day (4 months ago)
life 7 ME TOO! He's the perfect smartass! There would seriously never be a dull moment in your house if you lived this guy
Ross A (5 months ago)
this guy gets old fast. He should have stopped with his fake scam email jokes.
Amari Jacobo (5 months ago)
Ok, so here’s me story of “pulling a James Veitch.” So someone had DM’d me about a scam or something, and obviously, I _knew_ I had to mess with this person. They will be referred to as “Vlad.” Vlad: what u doin Me: Nunya! Vlad: wats dat Me: nunya buisness. (Stupid I know. I thought that would be it.) Vlad: How old are u Me: Exactly 638 years old. Vlad: please. serious Me: Are you calling me old? I should just stop talking to you right now. Vlad: no plz, exciting offer (I don’t even remember what it was for at the point. A gift card I think?) Me: Okay then, Vlad. You’ve captured my attention. Proceed. (He tries to talk about it.) Me: Okay, Vlad. Why don’t you do it? Treat yo self, man. Vlad: no, special offer just for u Me: Exciting! But I’m giving YOU the offer! Vlad, how would you like to win a _FREE_ gift card? Vlad: please be serious Me: I am being serious! Just give me all of your personal information, and it’s yours completely free! Vlad: you’re a d**k Me: Duck? Oh I love ducks! (I sent a bunch of duck gifs) Vlad: you want gift card or no? Me: Can I buy ducks with the card, because I exclusively buy ducks. Vlad: yes every duck Me: But Vlad, if I buy every duck there’d be no more ducks left to buy. I’m sorry, but this deal is over. No ducks, no deal. Vlad: f**k u Yup. I missed my opportunity to buy all of the world’s ducks.
Filipino Mapper (5 months ago)
WHAT HE CAME AT MELBOURNE INTERNATIONAL COMEDY FESTIVAL Damnit miss out on the chance to meet him in person
Evangelos (5 months ago)
This reminds me of the type of shit I wrote on papers in High School. Why the fuck didn't I do this!! Damn it! Didn't know people would like it. My teachers definitely did not. They hated it!!! lmao
yester day (4 months ago)
Evangelos Lol....whatd you do instead?