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How to Make a Human Pot Pie

14899 ratings | 385710 views
First you're gonna need about 500 potatoes, 300 carrots and 5 to 6 moist humans. See more http://www.collegehumor.com LIKE us on: http://www.facebook.com/collegehumor FOLLOW us on: http://www.twitter.com/collegehumor FOLLOW us on: http://www.collegehumor.tumblr.com CAST Zac Oyama Cynthia Kao Grant O'Brien Katie Marovitch Siobhan Thompson Mike Trapp Shane Crown CREW Director - Ryan Anthony Martin Writers - Zac Oyama Producer - Shane Crown Production Coordinator- Francesca McLafferty Director of Photography - Luc Delamare 1st AC - Christian Armada 2nd AC/DIT - Matt Richardson Gaffer - Vince Valentin Key Grip - Justin Lee Production Designer - Rick Mader HMU - Kathleen Pardo Sound Mixer - Danny Carpenter for BoTown Sound President of Original Content - Sam Reich Vice President of Production- Spencer Griffin Executive in Charge of Production - Sam Sparks Supervising Producer- Alex Edge Production Legal- Karen Segall Production Accountant- Shay Parsons Production Accountant- Chetera Bell Production Assistant - Caroline Bible Production Intern - Helena McGill Production Intern - Sharilyn Hernandez Post Production Supervisor - Melissa Balan Post Production Coordinator - Marissa High Licensing and Programming Coordinator - Theodora Hart Editor - Ryan Anthony Martin Visual Effects & Graphics - TJ Gonzalez Head Assistant Editor - Jess Green Assistant Editor - Spencer Kombol
Category: Comedy
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Text Comments (1368)
House Cat (15 hours ago)
The top right face in the pie strangely looks like Markiplier
Jennifer Samuel (19 hours ago)
The outro is really awkward because I never feed him clicks and I am just staring at a dude air eating
Gaurav K (2 days ago)
I am hungry
TheGoldenSubway (4 days ago)
buzzfeed ad on a college humour video, ironic
TheSodaDragon (4 days ago)
thanks for this recipe! tasted delisious but took me a while to find a volcano... should it be active or just like warm? also i now have two loose somewhere and im pretty sure they are reproducing. should i kill them or let them for a better source of humans?
Matthew Beadle (5 days ago)
make more of these
Rosie Low (5 days ago)
They could've eaten their way out.
Enterurn4me (6 days ago)
Lmao I thought this was a walking with giants parady
MickJamesSupaFreak (7 days ago)
Ok I'm confused isn't the giant human too?
Mr Same (7 days ago)
Where's the pot??
袁子盁 (7 days ago)
Um this is scary
juustgowithit (7 days ago)
wtf
HazellNut Gamer (8 days ago)
"And don't worry, if they give you too much trouble, just squeeze them until they die
The Memester (8 days ago)
I heard that vegan humans are bad for other humans because the vegans ones infect the other humans into vegan humans by showing them a video so I recommend getting your humans from a McDonald's restaurant because they have more fat and less vegans tend to go there so the meat is always good and healthy, if you have a pet human then I recommend feeding it more meat than veggies because if you feed them too much veggies then they are gonna die, if you see any vegan humans in your house or anywhere then kill them because they are pests
Lily Gamer (8 days ago)
XD
Liliana Villalobos (8 days ago)
remeber to add your preferred spices!
Lochlan McNeill (8 days ago)
amazing
Greyson Last name (8 days ago)
That was cool AND dumb 🤣
Ruby Red (9 days ago)
Do morr
Emily Belkowitz (9 days ago)
I want more of these 😍❤️💗
Quix (9 days ago)
This is a regular meat pie recipe, pot pie doesn't have a lower crust. Damn ogres and their lazy pie-making. Trolls are the ones with all the good recipes.
Ugh Okay (9 days ago)
Shouldn't you strip them naked? You don't wanna eat clothes!
THE MEGA LUCARIO (9 days ago)
more of theese
BaconedCake (10 days ago)
Dear Gorf, I have watched your cooking series from the very beginning when you made the roasted shark recipe, and since then I've turned to you for culinary help. When I first moved in with my spouse they were very angry because I was no use in hunting or making meals or collecting ingredients - even the easy ones like trees. Our relationship was fragile because we had a hard time surviving on our own, because my spouse was too busy dealing with rogue humans. But when I found your channel with all your helpful tricks and tips from the best livestock enclosures to pillage to things to avoid while collecting things near a sea. I gained the confidence to provide for my family and I did. You helped me overcome my depression over my uselessness and my spouse is a part jealous and part grateful because I can whip up a giraffe meringue better than anyone he knows. I've seen your channel grow and I grew with it. So, thank you. Love, A fellow giant PS: I think I saw you when you cooked the humans because I live near that volcano! I can't believe I came that close to meeting you!
Jack Pipe (10 days ago)
Damn, that was actually horrifying O.O
turtlelover59 (10 days ago)
Guys, I gotta say: I don't know if the things they call "clothes" work very well with the tastes of each individual Human. Now, I don't know about you guys, but to me they just don't _taste_ right.
Richard Servello (10 days ago)
Clothes would get stuck in your teeth.
Roe Rott (11 days ago)
my godzillas watched this and now all of japans population is gone.
Abi O (11 days ago)
I love College humor but for some reason this really disturbed me.
dumpling321 (11 days ago)
I feel like you should have show the process of cutting and serving the pie, it looks delicious and I would have liked to see how the filling turned out.
mind_combatant (11 days ago)
the double end slate is weird.
ThatAsiann (12 days ago)
I thought it said hot pot..
whosthedaddy30 (12 days ago)
that was just disturbing
TheTymeIsRyte (13 days ago)
This is the opposite of walking with giants
Vic Lin (13 days ago)
way too funny
Gian Carlo Fermin (13 days ago)
This would be a good series
M vids1 (14 days ago)
I'll definitely recommend this to em
Relle M. (14 days ago)
Watching this at 3am. I love it and yet I'm disturbed at the same time. Way to go CH! :D
Drablord (15 days ago)
HE FORGOT THE FUCKIN' SALT AND PEPPER! THAT SHIT GONNA BE BLAND!
Yuki Kazua (15 days ago)
This was actualy disturbing lol
Dan Wells (15 days ago)
no kitty this is mah pot pah
Niniischill (16 days ago)
Meateaters be like lol you can't eat people- they feel things! But of course all other animal grows off trees and can't feel pain!!
Pixel Bytes (16 days ago)
MAke a second one!
You wish You were Lin (17 days ago)
Is that a triangle with an eye in it at the bottom of the crust??? Yes!!
Spicy Bunny (17 days ago)
Some of the supplies that the giant used are from Cost Plus World Market...😂
Munching Pie (18 days ago)
Plz do more
I -heart- Human (18 days ago)
That took a big, dark twist. 😐
The Swan (19 days ago)
Still less appalling than Buzzfeed.
Jared Foote (19 days ago)
oh.
Andrea Tutty (21 days ago)
...gruesome
Stallya (21 days ago)
Doesn't even peel or boil the humans beforehand and no gravy? That's gonna be dry as the Sahara desert. 1 star
Ooi Jiong Kai (23 days ago)
Goddamn creepy
SerbAtheist (23 days ago)
I don't like large pieces of meat in my human pot pies, so I first tear the limbs off of each human. It actually kind of relaxes me. Then I dump them all in cold water and slowly heat it up as their torsos helplessly bob around. I know that dunking them in head first in boiling water is the humane way to kill them, but the meat just tastes juicier if it is slowly brought to a boil. When the screaming stops I know they are close to being done, so I prepare the crust and other vegetables. Now, there's this neat trick which saves up all the work. You can actually train these humans to be your personal slaves. Why bother the hard work of making the crust and putting all the ingredients in when a well trained brigade of around 15 or so human slaves can just do it for you? Seriously, once you dismember a fellow human in front of them, you can train these terrified little things to do just about anything. Just don't forget to supervise and put them back in their cage when they're done. When they're too exhausted, broken or feeble to be of any use just include them in your next batch of human pie!
Timmy The Pleb (23 days ago)
JESUS CHRIST
Seren (24 days ago)
Glad that I, someone who suffers from harrowing nightmares, decided to watch this right before going to bed. Tonight's gonna be fun.
John Smith (27 days ago)
You're not going to peel the people first? This cooking show is for idiots.
Robert Chiccarine (27 days ago)
I'm allergic to humans, do human substitutes work?
Lovi Poekimo (27 days ago)
Okay, first off, you didn't remove the skin and hair? And the toes & fingernails & teeth were also kept in for extra crunch???
John Jonson (28 days ago)
You ate their bones and clothes and didn't carve them. That's a horrible recipe. We didn't want to see all that tho, but the clothes would of been nice to remove. Finally see katies beautiful body
Y2K Blackout (1 month ago)
This was fucking disturbing!
Matthias Reith (1 month ago)
I found illumiati at the crust
PinchPeak5203 (1 month ago)
you forgot the gravy!!
FlyingCheezBurgers (1 month ago)
I can't believe they actually included and all seeing eye and no one has confirmed the illuminati yet
Samantha Reagan (1 month ago)
That pot pie is gonna be dry af there's no sauce or anything
anima099 (1 month ago)
Hey CH Loving your content since early last year. I always loved them but they got better last year. Don't know what you did but you just keep doing them! From a fan since 2009
Haven Swan (1 month ago)
Please make this a series!
Empyro Blitz (1 month ago)
Is it weird that I thought this video was gonna be about cannibalism?
Charlie P (1 month ago)
Looks dry.
StarSailorMars (1 month ago)
Plz make more
Sarah Alice (1 month ago)
Honestly more of these should be made.
cuckling (1 month ago)
lol instead of cooking with giants
Melli _Chan (1 month ago)
Yeah that just happened
Film Empire (1 month ago)
1:52 illuminati sign in the pie crust
Pewpew (1 month ago)
ahahahaaahahahaahahahaha
pointy morper (1 month ago)
This is how I want to go out
Tamás Viola (1 month ago)
perfect video to promote veganism lol
MUSIC & MORE (1 month ago)
wow thanks!
Beauty, Grace, Dorito From Space -peridot (1 month ago)
1:55 Gorf is cool cat confirmed.
jungcock (1 month ago)
I LOVE THE AGONY. does this make me a serial killer
Micah Burgess (1 month ago)
I want more of these videos
Tim Franks (1 month ago)
Actually tried to click on the 'golden eggs omelette' video. The disappointment on my face as I hopelessly clicked and clicked again...
Arman Nangia (1 month ago)
Lmfao do more plz!!
steamfans (1 month ago)
you know what goes good with a human pot pie? fava beans and a nice chianti
Pigface (1 month ago)
i acctually hoped the links would work
Fwimmygoat (1 month ago)
instructions were not clear got d*ck stuck in toaster
Vicious Servant (1 month ago)
You kept their clothes on? That's just archaic and primitive. I suppose you'd also add whole eggs into a recipe shell and all? Disgusting. And where's the sauce? Gravy? Meat and vegetables by themselves are nothing without spices. Honestly this is why you can't trust giant cooks. They do nothing except RUIN anything they try to make. Absolutely FUCKING HORRIBLE. You aught to be ashamed of yourself.
Vicious Servant (1 month ago)
+SamWes Puckett to the palette of a more dignified mythical creature one would tell that human blood is merely a salty tang of iron. Good for a meal where the meat is cooked on its own but ultimately resulting in a dry, sad, husk of a pie.
SamWes Puckett (1 month ago)
Vicious Servant The humans blood acts as a nice substitute for any kind of sauce.
ᕼᕮᗩTᕼᕮᖇ ᒍᑌᑎᕮ (1 month ago)
is it just me or at 2:01 did anyone else see Bill Cypher near the bottom of the pie? It might just be late night delusions though...
blox rocks (1 month ago)
THIS ISNT RIGHT you forgot to put in the filling
Leigh Marcotte (1 month ago)
Is this a parody of walking with giants
Saito Hiraga (1 month ago)
Gorf can you teach us how to make Human French Fries?
Luca Veneziano (1 month ago)
I would sub to glarf as long as he does not decided to use wiscosinites as his main ingredient
Lord Manedor (1 month ago)
You Suck At Cooking has changed a lot.
nicolas sequeira (1 month ago)
those veggies didn't really seem to fill up the whole crust. and there should be a gravy or something. also, wouldn't their clothes be inedible? and shouldn't he scrape all the meat off the bones so it won't be so crunchy? if he did that, he could grind the bones up to make his bread!
CheshireCatz 2319 (1 month ago)
This must've been so fun to film for the cast members
seba nebulosa (1 month ago)
YOU BETTER MAKE ANOTHER ONE ORE ELSE